Goals for 2018.

It’s been a while since I updated what I’ve been working on lately, and so I would like to share for anyone interested in keeping up with me. It at times seems like a very monotonous task as most often I can’t seem to keep up with myself, and life certainly feels like this lately; hence why I have big plans for this year (and leading into next) to change all that.

The reason I say this is that looking back on 2016, it was a really rough year for me. Everywhere I went I seemed to either have problems with people or people had problems with me, and it became incredibly burdensome. Amongst all this I had trouble with my Resident Manager where I was staying, trouble with a local artist I was trying to buy a painting from, trouble at work with the union and the owners of the hotel, trouble with co-workers, trouble with director’s and cast mates, and on top of all that, dealing with my grandmother’s death. Everything seemed very burdensome and the only relief was a visiting friend taking me out for the summer, close friends and colleagues I act with, and the rekindling of an old long lost flame. It seems a relief that the year ended by the one who got away coming back to me and delivering me from my misery.

It wasn’t until late 2017 that I realized how miserable Moncton was making me, and Fredericton, with all its faults, at least was some place else. In 2017, I finished a novel I was working on for years.  It was the first piece of work that I actually finished and thought good enough to sell to people. By no means a masterpiece, it was still a piece of me and I’m happy for that. So in that spirit I wanted this year to be just as productive. My goal is that in 2019, I will be more spontaneous and free.

My goals for 2018:

·      Downsize. I’m in a good place to do it: a bachelor apartment half the size of my place in Moncton. A good chance to see what of my possessions I really want and which ones I can live without. For a man who is deeply influenced by religions which profess detachment from material possessions, I sure have a lot of possessions.

·      Take in the city where I live. Hike and bike on the trails, see the parks, eat at local restaurants, and meet some people. Take in some theatre as well. This is something I’d like to start blogging.

·      Study the Greeks a bit. I’m on Aristophanes currently, and I’ve finished the big dramatists (or at least their Orestelian works).

·      Study Buddhism and return to Daoism. I’ve read the Lotus Sutra and a few writings from Thich Nacht Hahn, as well as works from Theravedian Buddhists.  So far I’m closer to being at peace, though deep inside I’m still bitter and angry about the past. Buddhist teachings are indeed challenging me in ways that are benefitting me right now.

·      Write more. My To Write list is way too long, I need to finish some work for friends to enjoy. I’m looking at a sequel to Clarewood Heights too, for a few that may be interested in it.

·      Blog all of this. Blog more. Share it. Hopefully you'll find it entertaining, interesting, or beneficial. Either way, writing a few reflective pieces are good and helps me remember what I’ve experienced.

·      Write some new music. It’s been a long time. I barely touch my guitar nowadays. But if I were to write maybe three new songs, I’m sure it’d be good for the soul.

·      Give consistently to charity, or do more charitable work. I hate not having enough time or energy to do this. Giving to Because I’m a Girl will be top on my list!

·      Get ready to travel. I put off travelling in my Twenties due to being involved in theatre in Moncton, but I think now is the time to go on that journey I’ve always wanted to. Or at least the first of a few.  My first experience travelling was through the ABU-Oxford Program and though I had high expectations and there were a few good things I benefitted from, it was mostly a horrible experience for me that involved slander, harassment, alienation, and just loads of confusion, which lead me to being depressed for years afterwards. I’d love to have a few good travelling experiences with people that I can trust and be myself around; experiences that will help me grow spiritually and intellectually, as opposed to hindering my spiritual and intellectual growth.

·      Overcome the bitterness and resentment that has haunted me so that I can truly be free and be the person I meant myself to be.

So, yeah… those are my resolutions. That’s my direction and where I am right now.

Sincerely,

Jeff o’Clock.